Sunday, May 21, 2006
♥ Final post

Yoyoyoyoyo!

This is a last post on Lonehearter. ='( This is the 490th post, over a period of 2 years, 3 months and 5 days. :D I've moved to a new blogsite! Haha.

Get the new site address from me, either on MSN, SMS or personally! And don't link me anymore! Haha. I'm keeping unnecessary people out! :D

:)

Thursday, May 18, 2006
♥ SA1

Oh, and I forgot to mention, I'm moving to a new blog site because I told myself to change it once the counter reaches 4000 since there ever was a counter in February. And I'm getting sick of the name Lonehearter. And because I like the new blog name more. Ah.

And also because I want to filter the readers the way you filter C2 in the last Chemistry experiment. Nah, I'm just crapping again. Told you I don't talk sense. You chose to read this yourself. Bhakra Nangal.

Sidetrack. My brother got a new printer. Which is finally printable. With scanner and photocopier functions, a 3-in-1. And a printer programme to install into the computer. About time to edit the info about me on the navigations column. But ah, I'm moving the site anyway. Wait lah, I'm lazy.

I wish I can be very lazy. But sadly, I can't. Eh? Nothing to be sad about anyway. VVV seems rather happy staying as V as he is.

Speaking of V, I suddenly recalled getting class position 12th in 4/1. With a L1R5 of 14. I'm not satisfied. Not at all. May have improved since last term, a L1R5 of 20, but I'm not not not not not satisfied. I want the top 3. Can only aim for 3rd though. And I'm 9 positions away. AHHHH.

English - B3
Chinese - B4
EMaths - A1
AMaths - D7
Physics - B3
Chemistry - C5
Geography - A1
Combined Humanities - A2

I got a 49 for AMaths but I can't do anything about it. I can't possibly go ask for marks from Mdm Wong because the reason why I failed AMaths is because I can't be bothered to hand in two out of three integrity tests and I end up with a score of 26 upon 100 for that 10%. Ah.

I got a 69 for Physics and I can't do anything about it. I tried asking Mr Yu for that one more mark but I can't say much since that one mark was lost through the file where I got 9/10. THAT is very very very generous of him since 8 out of 10 worksheets in that file are blank. AH.

There's nothing I can do about Chemistry because I passed all my tests by one mark or two marks or three marks. And I'm very lucky to get a C5 instead of a C6. AHH.

CHINESE ARH. What can I say man. I got the same grade as Spiky. 0_0 Which is, his big big big dream. And this is the first time I didn't Ace Chinese. Ow. Hurts so much to be disappointed. I'll try harder next time. (:

And I still love Geography because I love Mrs Theresa Lim and I love settlements and I love CBD and I love population and I love agriculture and I love market gardening. And I love the 84 I got for Geography.

I should learn to love other subjects as much as I do for Geography. Perhaps perhaps perhaps I may score those as well. Please rename me AMaths Ang instead of Geography Ang or something. Maybe I can start loving AMaths as well. HA. WHO AM I KIDDING. I LOVE AMATHS?! HA HA HA.

Alrights. I said I'll sleep early today. But obviously I'm not. =/

Will drink Daisy milk and go to sleep! :) Tomorrow will be a better day! :)

I'll stay stronger than you thought I could be! I'll be a tall and strong oil palm tree! Bhakra Nangal!

PS: You chose to read these crap. No one forced you to. TOO LATE FOR REGRETS. YOU JUST HAVE TO READ THIS AGAIN...

Bhakra Nangal! :D

♥ Not a nice day

I won't allow myself to be upset. Many others need my support. (:

And this is the 14th time I'm reminding myself: Anything that doesn't kill me only makes me stronger. (:

And I hope all those who fell sick get well soon! Including gillian. (?) Hope she catches her running nose before it runs too far away.

Tsk.

It seems like gillian and I are the only intact pair that hasn't moved an inch. If you understand what I'm talking about. Nevermind. The jerseys are another thing. And I'm beginning to comprehend what Weixin was trying to tell me three hours ago. Explains why I'm feeling guilty. When I shouldn't be. AIYA. NEVER MIND.

I'll sleep early tonight. And I might have to eat the KitKat Chunky to lighten my spirit. =/

Bye. And enjoy your Sports Day. Though I wonder what mine will turn out like.

...

Nevermind.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006
♥ GEOGRAPHY!

Wait wait... I must make this sentence really biggggg. As in, really, really, really, really, BIGGGG and EYE CATCHING.

I SHOOK MRS THERESA LIM'S HANDS TODAY.

And obviously, I still can't bring myself to eat the KitKat Chunky. (Pst. The Timeout is still in the fridge. I think I'll eat it later, now that I have Kitkat! :D) And I got the toy! :D

Today must be a beeeautiiiifullll day. :D

Um.

Yesterday's Physics tuition was hilarious. I recorded down the whole 2 hours of his lesson. Who can be so dumb as to think the time is one hour later than the actual time lah?! SUPER DUMB CAN. And he still greeted us with that reproachful look. That was so Miss Heng. I mean Mrs Yeo. And he didn't believe us when we told him the time is 6pm and not 7pm! We pointed out Holland Village is still playing on Channel 8, and he thinks that that's the commercial. We pointed out that all our handphones showed 6pm and only his showed 7pm, and he thinks we all changed it together to cheat him. We pointed out that even the clock in gillian's house showed 6pm, and he thinks that we changed that too (when he arrived earlier than us?!).

AND FINALLY. We pointed out that it can't be this bright at 7pm. And guess what! Nah, he didn't believe us. He didn't doubt us either. He totally ignored me. AHHHHHHH.

AND FINALLY FINALLY. We told him to look at his PDA. And when he saw the time, a bright true 6.05pm, guess what was his reaction!!

"Oh."

-____-

"Oh my... Oh my..."

-____-

And did I mention he banged into the glass door at gillian's basement last last lesson?

Woah. Applaud for the cutest teacher on Earth man. Wait no, the cutest teacher is Mrs Lim. Fine, I was just being sacarstic. He's nice, though. His temper must be the best in Singapore and JB, some say Batam. I kept suaning him throughout the two hours last lesson, because I remain very sore about that one hour he went through alone in some Ladatagala land, causing us to rush there after just starting to paint the class flag for ten minutes. Haha. And now I know his surname is Teo.

"MR TEO!!"

"Yes, Meigui?"

"Did anybody tell you your laughter is very funny?"

"Really? Nobody told me that before. -that classic laughter-"

-erupts into laughter-

But his teaching is good, lah. At least now I think Physics is not that Arthur (alien) afterall. :)

Ah. 9.15pm already. (According to Mr Andrew's time, it's 10.15pm ALREADY!!!) Time to sleep! Have a nice day tomorrow! :)

P.S: My new goal in life is to make gillian cheenah! She keeps saying I'm cheena, from Mu Dan Jiang to Chinese compos. And she wants to throw Chinese away. NOOOOO! (<-Looks like MOOOO -_- Nevermind.) I WILL make her love Chinese! (I KNEW IT gillian! I KNEW YOU'LL MAKE THAT FACE WHEN YOU READ THIS! HAHAHAHAHA!)

And, haiya, what did I want to say? Oh yah.

I SHOOK MRS LIM'S HANDS TODAY!!!!! :D

Friday, May 12, 2006
♥ Yawn

Hi.

It just dawned on me that the big Os everyone's been talking about is not very far away anymore. Very very near in fact. Term 2's coming to an end already. And my results are still as lousy as ever. Even though I thought I would do well this term. My Chem and AMaths are gone, so is Combined Humans. That leaves me with less than 6 subjects to take for L1R5, which is impossible. That's why I say I'm screwed.

And I want to get to NJ because I love the tie. Stop telling me the colours don't match, gillian. That's precisely why I like the tie.

Today.

Had Physics tuition with the Andrew guy. The four of us kept reminding each other not to make him laugh. His laughter is CLASSIC I tell you. Really classic. It's got to be the funniest laughter in the whole wide world. And gillian still sneezes continuously when you say AGAIN after she sneezed. The effect is even better if you say REPEAT instead of AGAIN. Remember to try it someday. :D

At 5pm sharp, we ended the tuition and I went Meiching's house to cook. -_- Food was yum and funny. Haha. Arkar and Anson competted to see who could finish the jelly first. And Arkar ended up swallowing the jelly whole. LOL. (What's the peristylsis word again?) Haha. Fell asleep on Meiching's bed after that, while they were watching Russell Peter (?). Sheryl's dad fetched us home after that. :)

My eldest sis just came home from Taiwan, amazed by all the tidbits and bread and food and food and food and food and food and food and food from Taiwan. She bought home food enough to last us the whole of World War Two when Japan invaded Singapore. Seriously. Apart from that, she bought clothes enough to fit two wardrobes. So much so that my mother had to go downstairs to help her with her luggage when she arrived in her taxi. -_- LOL.

Got to get some sleep. It's already 12 midnight.

Got this from an email, by the way.

We tell lies when we are afraid... afraid of what wedon't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us.

But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.

Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much... for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.

Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done, or could have had.

Don't be afraid to say I Love You if you truly mean it from the bottom of your heart.

...

Right now, I'm hesistating whether I should give the Mothers' Day card to my mother. Seriously, I think she'll laugh at me for a year.

Zzz.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006
♥ A BIG GRIN FOR YOU

Tada.

I don't really want to be reminded of the fact I have no idea who's reading this and how whoever's reading this will react to whatever I'm typing here. (sounds like a catchy phrase) But facts are facts still, and it seems like the second last entry had led to some, I don't know, enlightenment? Aye, whatever lah. (Eeyer, why did I just use that word.) I mean, anything lah.

(Mr TJH just sent me the BBQ photos we took. Shall post it up at fourone's blog later.)

Nothing much happened today, if you leave out all the talks behind the backs and the petty little things that happened along the way. Helped to paint the class flag after school, not yet done, shall continue tomorrow. Lessons were as usual, boring, except Geography. :D She's still as amazing as ever. (Shit, I shouldn't have used the word amazing. gillian!!! I didn't mean to use the word AMAZING!! SORRY MRS LIM!!!) I meant, erm, fabulous as ever.

I guess Sandy is right. Things change over time. I can't possibly expect everybody to stay the same always. I can't even say for sure I'll still be the way I'm now in time to come. Who is to say I wouldn't mix with the wrong people and become wrong in every way tomorrow?

Besides, (old phrase but I've to say it again) there's no clear cut to differentiate right from wrong. All a matter of judgement. Just because the majority feels that some actions are plain wrong doesn't mean it has to be wrong. Who decides what is wrong and right in the first place?

Perhaps to them, we're the ones having the 'wrong' attitudes giving them the 'wrong' treatment with the 'wrong' perceptions. As they are in our points of view.

Perhaps what we say about them among our groups have been said, repeated, duplicated in their discussions just that the characters change.

Perhaps Sandy can explain this feeling in me when I, once again, realise that people whom I can't stand may be reading this to find out what things I'm blogging about them. Ha.

And I wonder how long we'll possibly go on like this. I wonder when the last straw would be. I wonder how long I can stand looking at the face and keeping my hand with me. (Go on, guess which face I'm talking about, I'm blogging out topics for you to discuss over your lunch.)

Isn't it ironic. People who don't like you and know you don't like them are reading what is being said of them so that they can rebutt in their own small group and say what they please.

Hey. Reading this now yea? *waves! Today's Captains' Ball made me real hot. Real hot. Especially you. (Go ahead, guess which you! Man, this is fun!) Go ahead SMIRKing. It's only Chinese man. No doubt. I'm very disappointed I got 33/55 for the paper. But. I'm never going to let that demoralise me. Never.

This is probably the last entry I'm going to post sounding angry or depressed over this dumb thing. I'm not going to let insignificant yous (Aiyah, no guessing game) affect my life in any one way. For the used-to-be-great teammate of mine (Aiyah, no guessing game again), sad to say (although I'm not so sad), you've changed as much as you think you haven't. For the better or for the worst, I'm not up to decide. Should be better for you lah? Since you are, erm, happier?

As for the STG, I can't stand the face. Not your fault, but, aiyah, I just can't stand lah okay? Just make sure you stay like this kay, I may still be able to take it. One foot into my path and I'm not so sure what I'll be up to anymore. (This sounds like a threat? But I'm not saying it to anybody what! You chose to read this okay!) And yea! Fiona! I'll reserve the front row seats should there be a fight! :D

As much as you wish to find out what we have to say about you, we wish to find out what you have to say about us. But just when we feel like doing it, something inside us tell us we shouldn't even be bothered. Why care? Right. WHY CARE? You! Yes! YOU! Ask yourself! Why are you reading this now?

Sunday, May 07, 2006
♥ 4/1

4/1 class BBQ was fun.

Unhappy things aside, I felt pretty satisfied with the outcome of the BBQ. Although of course, that topic can't be avoided. Names still came up from time to time. But I'm glad all, if not, most of us enjoyed ourselves.

Thanks gillian for hosting the BBQ. Thanks for the cake. I loved the atmosphere when we did FOURRRRRRRRRRRRRR ONE the Yum-seng way after Mr Tan Jit Huih (Our mystery guest 1) said: To the best class ever, 4/1.

Thanks gillian, Weixin, Huiming, Chunying and Vanessa for helping to plan the BBQ. Thanks Huiming for listening to me pour out my unhappiness in the bus. Thanks all for making the BBQ a successful one.

By the way, if you haven't already heard, the mystery guest 2 is actually Mrs Poh. Yea, our principal, Mrs Poh. She actually came. Lol. And we drank sparkling water because we're all underaged. LOL.

Lastly, I've decided to take the advice people have been giving me.

To care only about those who care. For those who cared, we can only hope for the best. For those who's changed, we can't change them back. And to love what we have now.

That's all. I still love 4/1 nonetheless. :)

Saturday, May 06, 2006
♥ I for Influence

Dear blog, I still can't get my mind of that.

I guess most people around me could tell. I was rather unhappy yesterday. So much so that getting an A1 for Emaths didn't help in cheering me up. I told gillian, Weixin and Chunying over lunch what's bothering me. But yea, nobody can do anything about it.

I bought two lollipops after lunch. Not much help either. I slept rather early last night, but I woke up at 2.30am and couldn't get back to sleep.

...

What can we do man. It's super saddening to have to hate someone you were once great buddies with, you know. But I know I can't bring myself to joke around with her anymore. She can no longer take jokes. And I wonder, as I'm lamenting about how much she's changed over here now, what she's probably doing, thinking, saying with her gang of friends there.

(I guess most of you can tell who I'm talking about... Do I have to spell it out more obviously?)

For four years, we trained together. We went for tournaments together. We were from a team of 7 Anderson Badminton B Girls. She sat behind me last year. We joked about her being toot. We joked of her being slow. We are thinking of ways to bring her old self back now. Sadly, none found.

Haobo said "J bian le."
I asked "For the better or for the worst?"
He said "For her should be better."
I asked "Are you sure?"
He said "No."

Weixin no longer dared to speak to her even when she's sitting next to her. Haobo no longer dared to speak to her because she seems to be angry with him. I no longer dared to speak to her for fear I might just start strangling her and screaming WAKE UP.

She's no longer the type who smiles and laughs off your jokes. The only times I see her smile or laugh now are when she's with her gang. Her gang. She has her own gang of friends now. Gang of 4? And seeing how much people around me are starting to hate that gang makes me want to die. WHY SHOULD SHE BE AMONG THAT 4?

Today's 4/1's class BBQ day. I'm supposed to be high, over the moon, shrieking in excitement, hopping around in anticipation. I considered doing all that until this one thought brought me all down, both feet solidly on ground, or maybe even lower.

What's a class BBQ when there's a group hated by many others? What's a class BBQ when this group is not going to be present? What's a class BBQ when the hot topic discussed over the fire is most probably going to be them, them, them, them and them again? What's the point of a class BBQ when the class is united except for them? Then again, you call this unity?

I counted seven times yesterday when I really wanted to just go home after school and not go for the dumb games prelimnaries. I can't feel the class spirit anymore. But then again, who can I blame when even I myself am taking the long turn to my seat just to avoid walking past them?

Today is a happy day nonetheless. And I can't possibly spoil it with my bad mood. I invited that many teachers, and many others are coming. (Plus the mystery guests.) I can't possibly back out now. I'll find some way to cheer myself up within the next two hours. I'm meeting gillian, Weixin, Chunying, Huiming and Vanessa at 11am, headed Queensway to order the jerseys first, before meeting up with Shikin, Arthur and Anson to buy the food.




And in times like these when strangely all close friends are not close enough, I found the strangest person to confide into.

Thanks alot Sandy.

Thursday, May 04, 2006
♥ Statistics

We've been learning statistics for EMaths these few days. And I'm in the mood for some EMaths too. (stresses on E) Okay crap. Since when have I been in the mood for any school work other than Geography?

So here goes. Today,

3 people told me they feel that 4/1 is slipping into two groups.
3 people updated me on the blog issue.
2 people discussed her with me.
8 people I said Bye to.
2 times I fell asleep in class, during Literature and Physics.
2 times I reminded myself how much I love Geography and Mrs Lim.
2 times I felt like killing myself for running out of points to write during the Onde2 today.
4 times I said Bhakra Nangal for the fun of it.
5 times I asked myself if I've forgotten something. Turns out I forgot to tell Husna the time for taking EMaths test.
6 times I asked the teachers whether they're coming for 4/1's BBQ.
14 times I felt like listening to Mu Dan Jiang.

Tadadadadada. I love Geography. And because I wrote Geography in cursive on my handbook, gillian thinks that's my signature and Geography Ang became my new name.

-_-

Nothing much to blog about.

Tada.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006
♥ Great friends to die for

You know, sometimes I look at friends around me, and I start to think I should really be contented and appreciative of all these friends. Seriously, I have got friendships which i believe will go a long way in the future. Friends that you would die for.

There are times when people tell me, "Wei, have lunch together leh. Eat alone very lonely."

My reaction was always the retard one.

"Huh. Won't lonely one lah! There's always SANDY!" *puts arm around imaginary friend on my right*

There are times when people tell me, "I feel so antisocial because I'm going home alone." or "No one going home with me, like so no life."

Just today, I went home alone at 7 plus, after vomitting gallons of blood attempting to teach Spiky to remember "Bing dong san chi, fei yi ri zi han" and "Wang zi cheng long, wang nu cheng feng". And hey, for the first time in 16 (NOTE IT'S 16) years I felt how people have been telling me they were feeling.

Weird.

As in, I felt weird going home alone. Because it's the first time since a very long time since I last went home alone. And it felt weird when I'm in the train and I see this nerd RI guy with specs thick enough to look like jelly and I can't turn to someone on my right or left to tell him or her I feel like eating jelly. Okay nevermind.

Anyway, I was saying. What was I saying again?

Haha. Sorry. My mind's a little malfunctioning now. Maybe it's because I'm overjoyed about the EMaths test. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I love graphs and graph papers. HAHAHA! Sorry for being retard.

Anyway anyway, I wanted to say, suddenly today I feel very happy and contented that I have great friends around me. :D And perhaps, sometimes friends are all it takes to make one's life complete. Okay not really. Family is important too. For me, priority is always given to family, because I love my family to bits. But the other F, Friends! :D Haha.

Perhaps that's what marks the difference between two depressed persons, one with great friends and one without great friends. The one with great friends tend to recover from whatever setbacks faster. Really. Explains why I'm always, like that.

Sidetrack. Remember the post sometime ago? The "been a long time since I last fell down"? Haha. I fell down today! :D Yep, nothing to be happy about, but that falling down was one of the reasons why I was finally enlightened today and to seeing all these wonderful people around me.

The thing is, I fell down while running round a corner on Level 3. (I was running up to class to fetch Mrs Lim's invitation card to 4/1's BBQ!) and I fell. Bam. Pain like mad. Lol. But I stood up and continue running. -_- Even though the pain was woah, unbearable. I must have fallen down damn hard. A NIE trainee teacher came running after me, all the way to Level 4, just to ask if I'm okay. -_- Haha!

"I saw you falling down so hard, and then you just stood up and continued running!"

HAHA!

I'm okay now though. Just that I don't like the look of the bruise on my left elbow. It's the colour of the playdoh which I meddled with the colours and got a mixture of damn ugly colour. The one Fiona asked "WHAT'S THIS?!" when she first saw it. LOL.

Erm.

Suddenly, I miss my very long and black (okay fine, it has always been black) hair I once had. This, not short not long hair very difficult to tie! -_- No that's beside the point. (Why do I keep sidetracking myself? See, I did it again.) The point is, okay there's no point. Read the info about me on the left? <------- The last sentence says "I don't talk sense 7 OUT OF 10 TIMES I talk. Lastly, I Love wasting your time reading one of the 7 times I talk." HAHA.

Hrm. A thought just crossed my mind. Should I? Tomorrow perhaps. ;)

Woah! 10.45pm already?! (I feel sleepy the instant I see the time...) Bedtime! *hums Happy Tree Friends tune*

PS: I PASSED MY AMATHS. 30/60! THANKS EVERYBODY BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHO TO THANK! LOL! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!