Sunday, November 19, 2006
♥ Relax?

I'm stucked at home. Didn't get to see M today again, because they have nowhere to play M and the offer of my house isn't suitable for anyone except the killer. Everyone thinks it's too far, including me. But I still like my house. Because it's so far and you can actually see sunrise in the morning and go jogging at 6am or bathing in the river at 5. Except there's no river around. Nah, imagine you're bathing in a river then. Life's all about imagination.

Anyway, I was saying I'm stucked at home because I wanted to go to the library to borrow some books so that there's something to read when I can't get to sleep at night. Yah, but someone took my keys, maybe by accident. Must be Sandy, and now I'm locked up at home. Literally.

Sigh.

Uh. I couldn't get to sleep the past few nights. I think I'm going to suffer from a nervous breakdown soon. Yah, after the O. I always knew I'm weird. Last night, I felt so tired and sleepy when I was online, and I decided to just go to bed. So I went to bed and when I lied down I get so nervous because there seems to be so much that I haven't done. And I just kept tossing and turning in bed, making calculations for the days and the money and everything else.

So I got out of bed and went to get myself a cup of HL milk. But then I got so paranoid I start thinking the milk tastes funny. So I checked the expiry date. It says 8 December 2006. And then I freaked out because I thought it was 18 December already. I almost threw up the milk, until I saw the calender and it says November.

-_-

Anyway, I'm stressed because it seems like there's not enough time for me to get ready for prom and I'm broke (as usual). Actually, I don't know what I'm worrying about. Because I've got everything ready. The gown, the shoes (borrow from my second sis), the makeup (help from eldest sis), sponsor for cab fare to and fro (from brother). So what is it?

I think I'm stressed because I'm graduating from Anderson and I'm not ready to be an adult yet. I kind of miss Onana. I miss taking exams in the hall.

-_-

Uh. Maybe I'm feeling like that because I'm not getting enough sleep. I woke up at 3++am this morning after having a nightmare about a cheetah chasing me round the swimming pool. And then I fell into the swimming pool and drowned.

...

I know no one drowns in a swimming pool, but it's a dream and I can't help it. You think I choose to dream of a cheetah chasing me round the swimming pool?! -.-

I think I need a run. Right, I'll go jogging later. The weather's so nice. It looks like it's going to rain. And then I get to dash for shelter when it rains. Pretty good exercise. :)

Did I forget anything? Did I forget to send Mr Neo the graduation page? Did I imagine myself to be sending it when I didn't? Did I imagine his reply? Have I smsed the class about Mrs Yeo's offer to help anyone who doesn't know what to wear to prom? (Yah, she offered to provide useful advices for anyone who don't have anything to wear for prom. -.-) Have I packed my table?

... I did everything already what. Why am I still so worried? -.-

Maybe I finished everything to do in too short a time. It's only been three days since Onana ended. But it feels like it's been 2 months. I should really relax. But I can't. And actually, actually, actually I know the cause of it.

...

M!!!!!! I WANT I NEED M!!!!!

I love you M. Please come back to me. :(

I'm playing this Mahjong Fish game. Be back later.

>>> I need to relax.